It’s been a little bit since I’ve updated. I have been working a lot (which is taking a toll on my chronic pain & health) so I can put every dollar into savings for the next expense that will arise. Sometimes I want to give up the fight because I feel so exhausted/overwhelmed/sick/tired/upset, but I’m pushing through and not giving up. Ever. Let me said it again, I will never give up.
This past week has been a true test in my fight. On May 8th I finished work and got into bed ready to relax and watch a show before I went to sleep. I opened up my laptop and my browser was on the Twitter page where I search FinleyFawn (because I can’t see everything that people post so I do a live search). All of a sudden several tweets popped up and the username was vaguely familiar. This is because it was my ex and he’s used a variation of that name for as long as I can remember for other accounts. He was tweeting not only at my followers/supporters in what appears to be an attempt to defame me, but he also tweeted directly at me. We have a no contact order through the court and can only communicate via a certain website, that’s it, nothing else. This went on for almost 3 hours and I just couldn’t sleep. I have been very careful to follow court orders. I have my partner check my blog posts before I post them so I can make sure I’m not violating anything, I have not contacted my ex or any of his friends/family because I have no desire nor reason to, if he’s saying things about me to them I don’t really care (and I know he’s talked to someone because his best friend that he grew up with tried to follow me on twitter under a business account (FYI: if you own a business, one can look that business up and see your full name unless you 1. don’t post it and 2. have a private whois). He even went so far as to add #sexworkersrights and #enddiscrimination to his Twitter bio, which has since been removed). I emailed him and asked him to please not contact me, that was it. I was not mean, I didn’t say anything disparaging about anyone, just don’t contact me. It freaks me out because I am sure that if one person knows my alias and legal name because they are friends with my ex, then probably all of his friends know these things. So who else have they told? How can I feel comfortable leaving my house right now in fear that someone will see me and out my legal name and alias? This is a safety concern. I don’t know who knows what, and any outing of information that was not done consensually or on my terms is just not ok. If I am the one to choose to release my alias & legal name to you, that is my choice, but it should not be anyone else’s.
I filed a police report for harassment because it falls under Sec 42.07(7) of the Texas Penal Code for online harassment. It reads as follows:
Sec. 42.07. HARASSMENT. (a) A person commits an offense if, with intent to harass, annoy, alarm, abuse, torment, or embarrass another, he:
(1) initiates communication by telephone, in writing, or by electronic communication and in the course of the communication makes a comment, request, suggestion, or proposal that is obscene;
(2) threatens, by telephone, in writing, or by electronic communication, in a manner reasonably likely to alarm the person receiving the threat, to inflict bodily injury on the person or to commit a felony against the person, a member of his family or household, or his property;
(3) conveys, in a manner reasonably likely to alarm the person receiving the report, a false report, which is known by the conveyor to be false, that another person has suffered death or serious bodily injury;
(4) causes the telephone of another to ring repeatedly or makes repeated telephone communications anonymously or in a manner reasonably likely to harass, annoy, alarm, abuse, torment, embarrass, or offend another;
(5) makes a telephone call and intentionally fails to hang up or disengage the connection;
(6) knowingly permits a telephone under the person’s control to be used by another to commit an offense under this section; or
(7) sends repeated electronic communications in a manner reasonably likely to harass, annoy, alarm, abuse, torment, embarrass, or offend another.
I will be following up with the police department on Monday, I should have the temp orders by then which clearly state that we are to only communicate via a certain website. The following is from the hearing transcripts:
After many public tweets (45 to be exact, some tagging multiple supporters/friends/orgs) he began DMing people. I don’t know how many people have been DMed the same copy pasta story, but it’s quite a few. Of course people have messaged me telling me what happened, these are my friends, colleagues, and supporters that are involved in the SW industry, why would they not? I did not and will not respond to any tweets, but I will write about what happened, because harassment is not only illegal in general, the fact that someone is not supposed to contact me and has tweeted directly at me is in violation of the no contact order. Please just stop, this is not accomplishing anything.
I have continued working, I have continued using my social media, and I have continued all of this stuff knowing that at any given time someone I am acquainted with is either monitoring my Twitter and/or my cam. It’s hard to push through this and keep on keeping on, but I’m doing it. It’s been an extremely tough week for me because my stress increased tenfold and created a domino reaction of more intense chronic pain (daily), an illness (possibly an illness + allergies), fatigue & exhaustion. I literally just want to sleep for a week. I have been in so much pain and so tired, but I need to keep on pushing through because this is only the beginning. We have a long way to go.
In case updates, we are still working with the guardian, so it will be a little bit before the status hearing. A date has not been set yet, but once the guardian has done what she needs to do it will be set and back to court we go. This is going to be expensive. And then after that (depending on what happens) there will be a jury trial. I just had a friend go through a custody battle that lasted 3 days, no jury trial. That means that this trial will most likely be at least twice as long as that, if not more, and that’s a lot of hours to clock for attorney & legal fees, expert witnesses, and expenses. Not to mention the emotional toll it will take on me + loss of income since I won’t be able to work really during that time.
We are almost at $4k and cash out is in about 10 days. If you would like to help you can click the donate button below or send google wallet/giftrocket.com to firstname.lastname@example.org
All of your continued support is appreciated more than words can express.